Let me start off by saying that I understand raising ANY type of kid is sure to be an adventure in itself. Raising two boys with Autism guarantees me an adventure every day of my life! The last couple days have been especially trying with my two little guys! My husband has been in Iowa helping to care for his father after a Quadruple Bypass. So.....if I thought I lived the life of a single mother before...well.....I am really living it now. I had to get out of the house, just to keep myself sane....and then I realize what a HUGE mistake that was!
Yesterday the boys and I decided to brave the newly opened Trader Joe's all by ourselves. Mistake #1. The carts are pretty small, so I could only confine Max and tried to rely on Nick to walk close by. Well....Nick had plans of his own. We spent the first 10 minutes in the store with Nick running wildly, walking on the pipes that run under the deep freezers, spinning in circles and just generally acting like a maniac. I handled it pretty well for awhile....tried to keep re-directing Nick to help me pick out fruit, try samples of lemonade...whatever, but it just didn't work. Maybe if they had samples of wine.....but I digress. So....I finally got down on Nick's level, had him look me in the eyes and said, "If you run off again, you will have to ride in the back of this cart." I'll be damned if that kid didn't immediately run to the freezer aisle to walk on the pipes again!! I calmly picked up all 59 pounds of him and deposited him into the back of the tiny shopping cart. Cue the LOUD, ANNOYING, MAKE YOUR TEETH CLENCH scream out of NIck's mouth. You would have thought I was whipping the child within an inch of his life by the sounds coming out of his mouth. I don't know if people are becoming more tolerant or if I just care less than I used to, but it didn't get much of a reaction. Some people looked in our general direction just to make sure I wasn't actually beating him, but then continued on with their shopping. SO....I pushed around that stupid, tiny cart full of about 90 pounds of boys for the next 30 minutes or so. Eventually Nick stopped screaming and even managed to help me pick out some new treats to try. He became obsessed with the balloons the store had and calmly told the lady at the counter, "I want a balloon please!" She asked what color he would like and he responded, "Pink!" Max could not be left out and Nick assured him, "Here you go, Maxwell" as the lady was blowing up his blue balloon. Yeah....we had a pretty good night :)
Today I again subjected myself to spending the majority of the day in public with my kids. We went to the doctor's office, met my BFF and her son Blake for lunch and play and McDonald's and continued on to shop at Target. Now....if you know me and Ellee (BFF), you know that we can spend and entire afternoon at Target. I immediately contained Nick to the back of the shopping cart this time! He did a pretty good job, with the exception of the verbal stimming throughout the trip. So....we had lots of loud yells and screams for no apparent reason. Again, most people ignored the majority of the screams...surprisingly. I asked Nick to "use his inside voice" which resulted in a few "quieter" yells that eventually worked themselves up to full throttle....sigh. Luckily Ellee and Blake are used to being around my kids and are pretty darn tolerant. At one point, Nick informed me that he had to "POTTY" and could not wait, so I braved the bathroom with Nick and Blake in tow. As soon as I took him out of the shopping cart, Nick was off like a caged animal. Blake and I chased after him, as he spun in circles, ran and eventually disappeared behind the jewelry counter. I cringed about what Blake (yes a 4 year old) must be thinking...and I told him, "sometimes Nick has a hard time being a good boy." This was my way of explanation for the odd behavior that I know Blake must be noticing by now. Blake told me, "Sometimes I have a hard time being good too." Ahh.....I coulda kissed the kid for making me feel....well....a little normal for once.
We made it through the rest of the shopping trip with little incident, said our goodbyes to Blake and Ellee and drove home. By this time I was exhausted, sweaty and wondering why I take the kids with me everywhere I go. Later, I asked Nick, "did you have fun playing with Ellee today?" He repeated what I said, "Have fun playing Ellee today." I assumed he didn't really understand the question, but continued the conversation with, "who else did we see today?" Nick looked up at me (kinda like I was an idiot) and said, "Blake!" I was shocked....I know it seems small to most people, but what a big deal for Nick! And finally I was reminded that there is a reason we don't hide away.....thanks Nick (and Blake)for helping me remember.
